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Thank you, heartbreak.

I am thankful for my first heartbreak.

I lost track of how long it took me to process it because it took years before I ever fully acknowledged the pain of it. Instead of processing it right away I tried to resist it, escape it and deny it.

I was embarrassed to admit to my friends and family how much it hurt. I was frustrated with myself for feeling so much, constantly telling myself I “should” be over it. I carried this heartbreak around with me for years…even through some of the best years and times, it was always lurking like a sad shadow in the background. I acted out as a means to numb it or drown it out. It never worked. It made it bigger.

The only thing that worked was allowing it to be there. Honoring how massive it was versus minimizing it or claiming it should be different or easier.

My heartbreak taught me that healing takes the time it takes.

My heartbreak taught me that risking to love is also risking to hurt.

My heartbreak taught me that I can bring myself back with acceptance, love, and patience.

I am thankful for heartbreak.

It took me a long time to get here, so if you’re not yet here then know it’s okay. If you are still in the thick of it then just give yourself grace and a whole lot of love. Resist the urge to minimize or hide your pain. Allow it.

When you are ready, here are some questions that can help you process your heartbreak:

How can I use this pain to grow?

How can this serve me right now?

How can I accept this without trying to change reality?

What is the lesson I can learn from this?

Until then, love yourself and be kind to you. Allow the love of others to support you. It might not mend your broken heart, but it will show that your heart is still capable of feeling love.

(Image by Smadar Livne Fine Art)

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